No Life is Perfect
by Kate Rosen
Summary: COMPLETE! Looking around the room, he was sure that he had no idea where he was or why Abby and these children were here with him...
1. Where Am I?

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**   
I borrowed the idea for this story from the movie _The Family Man_. And, yes, I am still working on _A Way Back to Your Heart_. I wrote this for a fanfic challenge though, and I want to see what people think, so please review and I will post more. Thanks!!  
  
Just so you know, the challenge was from _One Can Only Hope_ and it was to write about Carter's belated birthday...

* * *

"_Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear, Daddy.._."  
  
"Abby?" Carter asked groggily as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and the room slowly came into focus.  
  
He saw Abby seated on his bed with two small children whom he was sure he had never seen before in his life. He sat up slowly. He was almost positive that he had fallen asleep in his own bed, in his own house, all alone the night before. Looking around the room, he was sure that he had no idea where he was or why Abby and these children were here with him.  
  
"Abby, what are you doing here?" Carter asked, confused.  
  
"Well, I know it's early," she said, glancing down at her watch, "But Jake just couldn't wait to give you his present any longer."  
  
"Jake?" Carter asked as he looked at the small boy seated next to Abby. He had a patch of hair that was sticking up on top of his head, and he was positively beaming at Carter with his toothless grin. His deep, brown eyes and the few freckles that dusted his nose reminded him curiously of his brother Bobby, but he was sure he had never seen this child before.  
  
"Happy birthday, Daddy!" the boy exclaimed as he handed Carter a present. Carter looked at the present and back at the boy. He was so confused that he was speechless. "What's wrong, Daddy? It's exactly one month passed your birthday ...Megan was so excited about today that she ripped your card a little. Sorry, Daddy..."  
  
"Who's Megan?" Carter asked, finally remembering how to talk again.  
  
"That's Megan," Jake pointed to the little girl with soft brown curls who was seated on Abby's lap, quietly sucking her thumb. "You're silly, Daddy," Jake said with a smile, but Abby looked a little scared. She could see the look of confusion of Carter's face, and she had no idea what he was thinking.  
  
Carter shook himself out of his fog. He was becoming angry about the situation now. "Would you please stop it?" he half-shouted at Jake. "I'm not your Daddy!"  
  
Tears instantly began to well up in Jake's eyes, and he ran out of the room quickly.  
  
"Nice one, Carter," Abby whispered coldly before she ran down the hall after Jake.  
  
Carter was left alone with a silent Megan who was still sucking on her thumb. She crawled onto his lap and snuggled up to his chest. Although he didn't know her either, he couldn't refuse such a sweet little girl. She couldn't be more than a year old, and looking at her face, it was obvious that she was Abby's daughter, but when did Abby had a child?  
  
_Where am I? Why is Abby here with me, and why does that little boy keep calling me "Daddy"?_ He thought to himself.  
  
Carter looked down at the present that Jake had tried to give him. He had been right; it was exactly one month passed his birthday. It's not like he had celebrated much anyway. He had been keeping to himself lately, ever since Kem had left him.  
  
Jake had given Carter a picture frame, which he had probably painted himself. There was a picture of Jake and him inside it, which Carter had no recollection of posing for. The card simply said, "Happy birthday, Daddy," in Abby's handwriting and "Love, Jake" in an untidy scrawl that was probably Jake's. There was a small tear in the left-hand corner, which was probably courtesy of Megan, he guessed.  
  
Carter glanced down at her. She was fast asleep on his chest.  
  
"Where am I?" Carter said aloud to himself. "Is this a dream?"  
  
"Well, you certainly were cruel." Carter heard a man's voice that made him jump in fright. He had not heard anyone enter the room. He looked up and gaped, open-mouthed at the man standing before him  
  
"Grandpa? I thought you were..."  
  
"Dead, yes, I still am," the man answered with a smile.  
  
Carter swallowed hard. "Am I, uh, dead, too?"  
  
John Carter, Sr. began to laugh. "No, no Johnny, you are quite alive indeed."  
  
"What, then am I dreaming, hallucinating, or just going crazy?"  
  
"None of the above," John replied. "Let me explain a few things. I've been watching you since my, uh, departure from earth, and much of what you're doing makes me happy. I love what you're doing with the Foundation, even though some disagree, namely your father..." Carter smiled. "I am proud of you, Johnny, but let me ask you something. Do you remember who told you to get involved with the Foundation and change its priorities?"  
  
Carter only had to think for a second. "Abby did...that night I took her to the fundraiser. Afterward, she said a lot of things that I didn't really hear then..." Carter's voice trailed off.  
  
"She says a lot of wise things. She's good for you. I knew it the first time I saw you with her at that charity event at the museum. You were good together. What happened?"  
  
Carter looked up. "Did you see what happened at Gamma's funeral?"  
  
"Of course I saw," John replied. "I was there in spirit. What happened wasn't Abby's fault, but she apologized anyway. She tried, but you shut her out. And then, how you ended up with that African girl is beyond me..."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Tell me the truth, Johnny. You never would have lasted as long as you did if it wasn't for the baby. Am I right?" Carter nodded slowly.  
  
"Okay, enough with the past. We're wasting time here. You only have 24 hours."  
  
"For what?" Carter asked, confused once again.  
  
"This," John said, motioning around the room. "This is a glimpse into what your life would be like with Abby. One day is all you have, though. So make it count."  
  
Carter looked down at Megan. She really was his.  
  
"Wait, what happens after 24 hours?" Carter looked up and asked, but his grandfather had vanished. 


	2. Apologies

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**  
  
A shorter chapter, sorry.... You probably shouldn't read this fic if you're going to vote for the _One Can Only Hope_ July challenge. Wait until it's posted on that site before you read it here. It's actually longer here, because there is a length restriction on the _OCOH_ site, and I had to cut a lot out. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, ignore my rambling and just read the story.  
  
On a different note, I was pleasantly surprised by the number of reviews that I have received already. I'm glad this idea is so well received. I wasn't too sure. I actually wrote this story on vacation, and the ideas kept coming. So, thanks for the reviews, and happy reading. :)

* * *

"Carter? Carter?!" Abby called from the doorway, trying her best to keep her voice down. Carter abruptly turned his head toward her. "What were you staring at?" she asked.  
  
"I, uh, nothing..." Carter replied.  
  
"Is she asleep?" Abby asked, motioning to Megan.  
  
"Yeah, she passed right out," Carter responded.  
  
"Only for you..." Abby rolled her eyes and half-smiled. "Here, I'll take her." Abby reached out and gently lifted Megan off Carter.  
  
"What do you mean, 'only for me'?" Carter asked.  
  
"She always goes right to sleep for you. She fights me to the bitter end," Abby glanced down at her daughter and slowly turned to exit the room.  
  
"Abby?" Carter called after her. "I'm so sorry about earlier." He slowly made his way over to her. "I had this awful dream. I didn't have Jake or Meg...or you...I was alone. I woke up confused, that's all."  
  
Abby looked concerned. "John, you've been having lots of disturbing dreams lately. Maybe it's just this time if year, I don't know, but maybe you should see someone.  
  
Carter thought for a second, not exactly sure at what Abby meant. "I'm all right, Abby, really, and I'm so sorry."  
  
"I forgive you," Abby smiled and leaned in to kiss him softly. The simple kiss was amazing, and Carter began to think that he really wouldn't mind kissing only this woman for the rest of his life.  
  
Abby pulled away suddenly, "But Jake's the one that you really ought to apologize to."  
  
"Right," Carter agreed as he made his way down the hall.  
  
"John?" Abby called to him. He turned around and saw her pointing to Jake's room, which he had just walked passed.

* * *

Carter knocked slowly on the doorframe. Can I come in?" he asked. Jake nodded without looking up from his coloring book. He made his way over to the small table at which Jake was seated. "Mind if I sit?" Carter asked. Jake nodded again without taking his eyes off of his book. "You're doing a great job coloring that _Spiderman_ picture."  
  
Jake finally looked up. "Thanks," he said and quickly returned to work.  
  
"Jake, listen, I'm sorry. I love your present. You're quite the artist. And I'm sorry about what I said. I just had a bad dream and I was confused and scared. Do you ever have bad dreams, Jake?"  
  
Jake nodded slowly. "Yeah...Yeah Daddy. Sometimes I have bad dreams, too. It's okay, Daddy," Jake said as he embraced Carter in a fierce hug. "I love you, Daddy."  
  
"I love you, too, son," Carter replied with a smile.

* * *

"Everything okay now?" Abby asked as Carter re-entered their bedroom a few minutes later. Abby had just finished making their bed.  
  
"Yeah, we talked. Then _Spiderman_ came on, so I had to leave."  
  
Abby smiled. "Well," she looked at the clock and back to Carter. "Meg should be out for at least another half hour. I'm going to take a shower," she stated as she took off her pajamas and dropped them to the floor. Carter then watched her slowly walk to the bathroom, wearing nothing but a smile. Just as she reached the door, she turned to ask, "Are you coming?"  
  
Carter certainly did not have to be asked twice. 


	3. Danny

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**  
  
Thanks for the reviews. They are all so encouraging and positive. I hope you all don't hate me after this chapter, but this is where you learn why I gave this story the title that I did...

* * *

Carter entered the lounge at County General about two hours later for his shift that Abby had reminded him was at noon. Opening his locker, he noticed that several pictures and drawings decorated the inside. The drawings were all from Jake, he guessed, considering it would be silly to hang up drawings done by his wife, and Megan would probably just eat a crayon if it was given to her. Studying them closely, he realized that Jake really was quite an artist. There were drawings of the beach, a baseball game, and a family portrait. Carter had come out looking pretty well, as far as children's drawings go. The drawing also included Abby, Megan, Jake, and...another boy? Who was the other boy in the picture? Did he and Abby have a third child?  
  
Still looking in his locker, he saw lots of pictures. He saw Jake, Megan, and Abby at the beach, which was probably taken by Carter himself. There was a picture of Megan covered in chocolate, probably a birthday party of some sort. There was a picture of Jake at bat in his baseball uniform. And...a small picture in the top corner...one he might have missed if hadn't been studying them all so closely...was of Jake and another small boy that he didn't recognize. He pulled it down to take a closer look. Could it be? Did he have a third child—a second son? If so, where was he? Maybe he was just a friend of Jake's...yet, they looked like brothers...He was so engrossed in his thoughts and the picture that he didn't hear Susan come in.  
  
"Hey, Carter." Susan's voice startled him and caused him to jump. "Sorry," she added as she peered over Carter's shoulder to see what he was staring at. "Oh...How are you guys doing?" she asked with a sympathetic look in her eye.  
  
"Okay..." Carter answered hesitantly, not really sure what she was asking.  
  
"I know this time of year is rough on you guys...I'll leave you alone. I just wanted you to know that things are starting to stack up out there..." she added as she turned to leave.  
  
"Thanks, Susan. I'll be right out," he answered. He returned the picture, closed his locker slowly, and exited the lounge with more questions than when he had entered.

* * *

"What do we got?" Carter asked as the EMTs brought the patient out of the rig in the ambulance bay an hour or so later.  
  
"Approximately four month old female found unresponsive by mom in her crib. We've been bagging her the whole way here, but..."  
  
"It's okay, Carter, we've got this," Weaver said, motioning to Luka and herself. They had appeared out of nowhere. What were they doing taking a patient from him like this?  
  
"I'm fine, really," Carter said. "I've got this."  
  
"That's okay," Luka said, wheeling the little girl inside. "Why don't you take that sprained ankle in one?"  
  
"Sprained ankle?" Carter said half to himself after his friends had gone in. "Doesn't anyone trust me anymore? Did I do something wrong?"  
  
"They're just trying to help," Carter's grandfather appeared to him once again.  
  
"Help what?" Carter asked.  
  
John Carter Sr. exhaled slowly. "Come sit here with me, Johnny," he motioned to the curb. Carter sat beside him, and John began to explain things slowly. "Do you remember that picture that you were looking at in your locker earlier?" Carter nodded slowly. The pieces were slowly starting to fit. "Well," John continued. "Jake, uh... He had a twin. His name was Danny, uh Daniel. Daniel Robert and Jacob Matthew. They were fraternal twins. Danny never, uh, made it to their first birthday..."  
  
Carter looked up at his grandfather. "What happened?" he asked.  
  
"I'm not sure. Danny was the weaker of the two. He was born second, and he wasn't breathing at first. But, they got him to start breathing pretty quickly. Then everyone thought he was okay, but one night...he just...he stopped breathing. I think they called it... SIDS?" Tears began to well up in Carter's eyes. John continued, "It happened the day after your birthday actually. That's why you all celebrate a month later now. But...you and Abby are doing pretty well, actually. Considering everything that's happened...It took you a while to try for children again, though. Meg is almost five years younger than Jake."  
  
"So, the dreams that Abby was talking about..."  
  
"You had trouble sleeping in the beginning. You would wake up in a cold sweat to check on Jake. For a while, you slept in his room to make sure he was okay. The fact that you still had Jake was such a blessing, because both you and Abby knew that you couldn't give up. You still had Jake to think of." Carter was silent, but John continued. "You sleep much better know than you did five years ago, but the dreams still come back every once in a while...especially around your birthday...I know what you're thinking, Johnny, but no life is perfect. Like I said before, you and Abby are doing pretty well...Johnny?"  
  
"I have to get back to work," Carter said as he abruptly rose and walked back inside the hospital. 


	4. Finally Understanding

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**  
  
A little bit of fuzz, per your request. There is just one more chapter to go after this one, and it's pretty short. Keep the reviews coming. Let me know how I'm doing. Thanks again to all of you   
who reviewed already. Enjoy!!

* * *

"So, how is your ankle, Mrs. Carson?" Carter asked the woman in Exam 1. He got his first look at her after glancing up from his chart, and she was gorgeous. She couldn't be more than twenty-five years old, and her long, perfect legs were crossed with the bandaged one on top. She had long, blonde hair, and she looked as if she had just stepped off the fashion runway.  
  
"Actually, it's Miss Carson," she corrected him with a smile. "And it doesn't hurt so much now that the nurse gave me something for the pain. I'm just more embarrassed than anything. I tripped and fell off the runway in those stupid heels."  
  
"Runway?" Carter asked.  
  
"Yeah," she looked down, embarrassed. It was a charity fashion show." So, she really was a model... "It's just something that I do on the side. I'm actually a law student, but people look at me and they just see a blonde bimbo..."  
  
"I don't," Carter said with a smile that she quickly returned. "No let me see if I can finish up with that ankle, so you can get out of here."

* * *

"Take one of these every four hours for the pain if you need it, and come back in a week so we can make sure everything's healing all right," Carter handed Miss Carson her prescription out by the Admit desk.  
  
"Thank you so much, Dr. Carter...Listen, I don't mean to sound forward or anything, but, would you like to go out sometime?"  
  
"I would love t—" he started, but stopped himself quickly. What was he doing flirting with this woman? He was a married man...well, for today anyway. Either way, there was no way that he could ever cheat on Abby.  
  
"I'm sorry, but I can't," he began again. "But I am very flattered..."  
  
"Okay," she responded. "Thank you anyway," she continued as she limped off toward the door. Carter glanced down at his watch. It was ten o'clock. Only two hours remained until he got to go home to his family..._his_ family.

* * *

As Carter entered his and Abby's bedroom later that night, he tried his best to be quiet as he changed into his pajamas and climbed his exhausted body into bed. Abby instantly rolled over and put her arms around him.  
  
"Hey," she whispered.  
  
"Hey, I'm sorry that I woke you," he answered by kissing her forehead.  
  
"You didn't," she responded with a gentle kiss on the lips. "I was waiting for you. How was work?" she asked, snuggling in closer to him.  
  
"Not bad. Except for one patient..."  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Uh, an infant girl was brought in. She was found in her crib not breathing..."  
  
"Oh," was all that Abby could say.  
  
"Kerry and Luka took her from me," Carter continued. "I guess it was for the best."  
  
"Are you okay?" Abby asked.  
  
"Yeah, you?"  
  
"Yeah, sometimes I feel bad, but we have so much to be grateful for. Of course, we'll never forget Danny..."  
  
"Of course...Abby, can I ask you a question?"  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"Do, you, uh, ever worry about our kids being bipolar?"  
  
She sat up quickly, "Why, do you?"  
  
"No, no, no," he answered quickly. He didn't want to scare her. He just wanted to know what she thought.  
  
Abby snuggled back into bed, close to him. "Sometimes, yeah, I do, but I don't let the worry run my life anymore. I think it was a blessing that we got pregnant with Danny and Jake by accident." Carter silently smiled at this revelation, and Abby continued, "We were still talking _about_ having kids at the time, and we might have never decided. I guess the decision was made for us, and I wouldn't change it for the world. Well, maybe just that Danny could still be with us..."  
  
There was a moment of silence before Carter said, "We made some great kids, didn't we?"  
  
"We certainly did," she agreed. It sounded like he was slowly losing her to sleep, though.  
  
"Abby?" he asked.  
  
"Hmm?" she answered, almost totally gone now.  
  
"I love you," he whispered.  
  
"I love you, too, John. Good night."  
  
After Abby had fallen asleep, Carter tried his hardest to stay awake. He didn't want to wake up alone again. Now that he had Abby in his arms, he didn't want to ever let her go. He understood now. He understood what his grandfather had said about no life being perfect. But he also realized that lying here with Abby in his arms and their beautiful children sleepy peacefully down the hall was the sweetest imperfection that he could ever hope for. He sat up a little, still holding Abby tightly. _Maybe if I just stay awake all night_, he thought to himself. _Maybe if I just never go to sleep again_... However, as the sun began to rise slowly in the window across the room, Carter's eyes became just too heavy to hold open anymore, and his body was overtaken by a peaceful slumber.

* * *

The incessant beeping of his alarm awoke Carter the next morning. He reached over in hope, but only succeeded in grabbing a pillow. As he slowly opened his eyes, he realized that he was back in his apartment, and all alone once more. 


	5. Shall We?

AUTHOR'S NOTE   
Just a tiny little epilogue. ..Carter finally got the kick in the ass that he needed, I guess. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews.

* * *

Carter made himself a pot of coffee, and drank slowly from his cup, deep in thought...so deep in thought was he, in fact, that he almost didn't hear the knocking at his front door. Through the peephole, he couldn't be happier by who he saw. He threw open the door quickly and embraced Abby in a fierce hug.  
  
"I missed you, Abby," he whispered.  
  
"I missed you, too, Carter," she responded and patted him on the back, although she was a little confused by his enthusiastic greeting. As they pulled apart, she asked, "Are you okay, Carter?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine," he responded, just content to stare at her, hoping that he would never have to see her leave again.  
  
"Well, get dressed. I'm taking you out for breakfast. I know you're not on until noon."  
  
"What for?" he asked.  
  
"Well, I felt bad about ignoring you on your birthday, but none of us really knew how to approach you or if you felt like celebrating. So, think of this as a kind of belated birthday present." Carter just kept smiling and staring at her. "Well, hurry up, we don't have all day."  
  
"You're right," he said, running to his room. "I'm glad you came by, actually, because I need to talk to you," Carter shouted from his room as he rushed to get dressed.  
  
"Okay," Abby answered, a little confused.  
  
Carter reappeared a minute or so later. He was dressed and ready to go.  
  
"That was fast," Abby remarked.  
  
"Yup," Carter answered. "I'm not wasting any more time. Shall we?" he asked, offering his arm. Abby took it willingly and they made their way outside together. 


End file.
